2004-10-29, 11:52 p.m.

The Religious Society of Snack Foods

I bought a package of "Quakes" at the grocery store yesterday. Partly because I was hungry, but partly because I just couldn't resist a BBQ flavored rice snack that is named after what my religion does in the presence of God. It's really just a little too weird. I believe that I may actually belong to the only religion that has not only salty snacks, but also instant hot breakfast and motor oil - and probably some other things I've forgotten or blocked out - attached to its name. Occasionally, I try to be offended by this, but I just can't muster much indignation. Maybe because if it weren't for the breakfast foods et all, half the country wouldn't even know that we exist. And that�s not even mentioning the whole �Gee, I thought you couldn�t have sex� thing.

Having had sex and gone on to cherish the results, I can happily report that the baby boy is fabulous. His new favorite activity is trying to roll over and escape while having his diaper changed. He LOVES this. Me, not so much, but it is funny, and we get lots of tickles and giggles in, and so far he has neither peed all over the bed or myself, and I have managed to keep him from plummeting off of the bed as well. But I may switch to diapering on the floor, just to be on the safe side.

Also, pampers brand diapers, although the best at stopping leaks, are way too perfume-y. Total blech. I'm honestly not certain which is worse - the natural odor of the 'fresh scent' diapers, or Leon's new fruit, veggie and cereal inspired solid-poops. Double blech, although they are easier to clean up than the almost liquid pre-solid-food poops were. Which is a good thing, because it is not easy to wipe a baby bottom while its owner is trying to crawl away and chew on the alarm clock.

On a note totally unrelated to diapering, but semi-connected to buying snacks at the grocery store, I can not find words to describe how happy I am to have discovered the "International Foods" aisle at the Meijer. Meijer is the ENORMO-grocery around here - it's sort of like a Walmart or Target, but local to Michigan, and with an extensive grocery/liquor section, and really good produce - but it's cheap, really the cheapest place around. And it's pronounced Meyer. Go figure. Anyway, the International Foods aisle is sort of silly - it's where the spaghetti and canned tomatoes reside, for instance - but it's also quite extensive - Hobnobs, anyone? Polish candies? - and much to my delight, sells (drum roll, please) Cafe Bustello. In canned, vacuum packed, and instant versions. I had pretty much given up on ever getting decent, strong coffee around here without paying an arm and a leg - particularly for instant. And then, one day last week, there it was! Lots of it! Stocked regularly! And well, yes, it is a bit more expensive than your Folgers or Maxwell House, but, I care not, my morning coffee is totally worth it. The Cafe Bustello makes me so happy that I will wander down the IF aisle even when I don't need to buy any, just to look at it, to make certain that it's still there.

The underlying tragedy of finding the Cafe Bustello is that back in Brooklyn there were actually a bunch of other vacuum packed brands sold at the local Met, and they were just about as good, but always cheaper. You could usually get two 8 oz bricks of Cafe Pico, or one of its competitors, on sale for the appallingly low price of $3. Sigh. I really took good, cheap, strong Dominican and Puerto Rican coffee for granted back then. Never again.